Month: December 2024

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It’s Time To Go Home

With tears flowing down my face I uttered “It’s time to go home”. This day had been coming for nearly a decade and the words just came out. When the cancer specialist said that her cancer was 95% he had lived up to his promise. There were no other signs of a problem except that she simply did not eat enough to survive. So it was time to come to her physical home knowing that the next time she is called home it will be with The Lord God Almighty. All I can do as her husband is provide the food that he has given us and then it’s up to God if she will eat or not? Alive Hospice came by the house yesterday and that was a good thing.

We know that more than likely this will be our last Christmas together and she sleeps I can’t help but wonder if the next time I check on her she will be The Lord God Almighty.

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Church Friends Vs. Real-Life Friends

For believers of faith they have 2 basic kinds of friends in their lives. Church friends are those you see at your house house of worship and maybe do some sort of ministry together.

Real friends are those who are in your daily battles of life on any given day regardless!

Both of these can play a vital role in your life but they are different and to think otherwise you are only fooling yourself.

Last night while my wife and I were in the emergency room again we were talking about several topics as it has been such a long stretch of issues with her health. I said to her “It sure would be nice to have a shoulder to cry on over all of this” She understood what I meant and has been seeing the toll all of her health issues have been taking on me.

You see real-life friends are there with their shoulder for you to cry on.

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Will She Ever Come Home?

I was asked yesterday if my wife would ever get to come home. My response was ” I think so.” Well, after spending time with her yesterday, I am not so sure. She has been through so much and this is the most depressed I can ever recall seeing her in our over 25 years together. Having gone through what she has gone through I think anyone would feel depressed. The facility has mental health people there to help her but I will bring in people I trust to try and help her.

Will she ever come home? Only God knows that!

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The Awaited Call

As I await a phone call from my wife with the results of a medical test that could change everything. You would think that we you have to have your wife admitted to a hospital 5 times with about 7 and a half weeks you would get somewhat use it the wait. You don’t because you simply never know how things are going to change next.

As I sit here alone ( again) and ponder what tomorrow is for me personally ( my 65th birthday) I look back to a conversation I had with my mother earlier today. She asked me if I was excited about tomorrow? No and why should I? For me, it’s just another day in which I worry that the love of my life will be taken from me.

Will that call come tonight? I have no idea? The loneliness I feel won’t be leaving anytime soon then again in ways it hasn’t since this journey started all those many weeks ago.