Over the last 48 to 72 hours the love of my life is starting to struggle more and more. The reality of this hits every second harder and harder. Just when I think I can’t cry any harder I seem to be able to pass that mark time after time. That is with her still being here, but the harsh reality is that the end may be close. These are the times that you put aside any differences with family members. Those things don’t matter at this point. Her daughter is traveling this week and we hope she makes it until she returns. Regardless I have a phone call in my future that will be the hardest I have ever made and that is to tell her daughter that her mother is gone.

Personally, I am in pure survival mode. I do whatever it takes to get me through one more second. I do sleep some but when I awake I can’t go back to sleep with my mind racing in so many different directions.

She has said that when something happens to her she wants me to take a trip to the beach! of course that would be a hard thing to do because once she is gone I will be all alone and in ways that hurts even more.