Tag: Church

Posted on

Another Sleepless Night

Well, here I am again. I haven’t had much sleep, which is the norm these days. The major reason, of course, is my wife’s failing health. It is not so much thinking about it on a conscious level but a subconscious one. Someone said in an e-mail yesterday that I am carrying a heavy load and they are right.

However, when I look closer at what I am feeling, it comes down to one fundamental fact. Like many millions of other Americans, we don’t have a day-to-day physical support system. People who are there regardless of what is going on in their lives. Sure I can bring in home health and the like but that still does not change that fact in our lives. When I hear people complain about this person or another in their lives I just want to scream “You don’t understand how fortunate you are to have those people being there for you”

So it’s thanksgiving and we do have so much to be thankful for and we are blessed in so many ways.

For those of you who have a day to day support system in your life cherish every single second because when you don’t there is such a void that cannot be put into words.

Posted on

Church This Morning?/Cancer

As I sit here this early November morning, I ponder whether I should attempt to go to church?

You see my wife’s cancer seems to be picking up its attacks on her body. Her daughter is coming by to spend time with her, which will be good. I feel tired, alone and emotionally exhausted. Then in the morning, we have a doctor’s appointment with a cancer specialist that we have been told in advance she very well have to be hospitalized for the 4 time in about a month.

When we started this fight with her health we thought it would be about her heart but cancer decided to rear its ugly head. ( like so many others)

Am I going to church this morning? I have no idea. Will I be able to take a nap before that decision has to be made? Nope

Posted on

Life After Losing a Loved One

On this cold November morning, the stillness is only broken by the breathing of my most cherished loved one. The question for me is how many more times will I hear that cherished sound? Of course, none of us know when that sound will end for any of us yet that can be scary and yet comforting.

Will this be the day that those sounds will end? I have no idea but based on conversations with her and how her health has started to fail more and more each day and sometimes each hour. I will still hurt like I have never felt before and yet she will be in eternity with The Lord Jesus Christ and that is all that truly matters.

So is today the day I really start to look at how life would be without her after all of these years? Probably……………………

Posted on

All Alone But Not Really

As I sit in our home it seems too large and empty for the one that makes it our home is still in the hospital fighting with every fiber of her being. As we spent time together this afternoon we shared memories of days gone by and the real seriousness of the issues we face regarding her health. I was able to show her a performance from the children at church this past Sunday and that made her so happy!

However, as another night falls upon us the tears will surely flow tonight for me I know that although I am physically alone in reality I am not alone at all.

You see, The Lord Jesus Christ is watching over me every single second.