Tag: Faith

Posted on

Does Anyone Truly Care About Me?

The above question is something that long-term caregivers ask themselves regularly and the reality is that it is a question I ask myself regularly. As my wife’s health continues to fail with another transfusion yesterday for my wife that question comes up for me more and more. I understand that her and I are pretty much alone in the day-to-day fight and the focus on her health is correct.

However, the reality is I do turn 65 this Thursday, and on Friday we find out if all of the aggressive treatment for her health has worked or not.

The reality is that this early November morning, besides my mother and my wife, my list gets really short quickly. Who knows why that is, but the reality for me is that is how I feel, and especially now, actions speak louder than words.

Posted on

Another Sleepless Night

Well, here I am again. I haven’t had much sleep, which is the norm these days. The major reason, of course, is my wife’s failing health. It is not so much thinking about it on a conscious level but a subconscious one. Someone said in an e-mail yesterday that I am carrying a heavy load and they are right.

However, when I look closer at what I am feeling, it comes down to one fundamental fact. Like many millions of other Americans, we don’t have a day-to-day physical support system. People who are there regardless of what is going on in their lives. Sure I can bring in home health and the like but that still does not change that fact in our lives. When I hear people complain about this person or another in their lives I just want to scream “You don’t understand how fortunate you are to have those people being there for you”

So it’s thanksgiving and we do have so much to be thankful for and we are blessed in so many ways.

For those of you who have a day to day support system in your life cherish every single second because when you don’t there is such a void that cannot be put into words.

Posted on

Maybe 3 Weeks The Doctor Thought

Early this week in one of the most important doctors’ appointments that we have yet to have over my wife’s failing health we were told if we stayed on this course of treatment she probably have about 3 weeks to live. That will get your attention! We were given 3 choices to consider.

  1. Do nothing and try and make her comfortable. ( Not really an option)
  2. Send her home without anything and by the first part of next week to try some different.
  3. Put her in the hospital right now and get really aggressive with her treatment and that she will be in the hospital for at least a week.

For us there really wasn’t a choice and that was option number 3. ( we had actually thought they were just going to send her home)

Will this work? We have no idea and this is not fun to go through for both of us.

For believers, it really comes down to one simple question.

Do you have faith or not?

We do and we rolled the ” faith dice” of our lives because in the end we really didn’t have a choice.

Posted on

Hope Is All That We Have

As we go through life with our struggles one has to realize that all of us have and need is hope. Now that hope can be found in our Lord Savior Jesus Christ. My wife ( who could have been my late wife we the news we were given today) has this favorite saying” There is always if you are on this side of the sod” That is true. So she will be gone for at least another week to get the help she needs. I will on the other hand sit in an empty house by myself again and some things never change. It’s no fun going through tough times alone and I have never gotten used to it. So all I must have is hope from our Lord Jesus Christ that the house won’t seem so big and the tears won’t be so bad this time. Because my biggest fear is losing her and for that I am certain.